Meeting up with an old friend from my past the other day was wonderful. We got to reminiscence over our past experiences overseas. Then we began to drift in conversation to discuss where all of our past friends and co-workers are now. We fumbled in discussion about how some are instructing, or others are having children. There was only one common variable, that we were all going our separate ways.
It seems only like yesterday that all of us where in high school planning out our lives. We knew that our friendships would last forever and that our destinies were bright. We had no idea who we were or where we were going. I remembering just being so excited to live in my new found freedom.
I found my path quickly, and began to chase after my goal. Weirdest dream ever, I thought I was going to be a war hero. I know how absurd it sounds, but who wasn’t absurd in their youth. So, I sacrificed and suffered to get to my to goal, and within a couple years I was “in country” with my new found band of brothers. Throughout that time, I really changed. I found myself. Funny how experiences work like that. In this miserable situation, I had found my true life long friends. Hell, I figured if we survived this, then would would always have each other. Time moved quickly, and before you knew it; I had married and left the military in search of a new future for my family.
I know that I am abbreviating a lot of history, but I am describing as I remember it. It just seems like one day I blinked and here I am. Like yesterday never happened. Wow, its so crazy how every time you turn around the world is new. Its like you have an uncanny sense of Déjà vu, but you still are telling yourself that you have never been here before.
So, here I am with another daughter possible arriving within the next few days, and I don’t know where time went or where it is going. I am happy, but so many times I said to myself I can’t wait till this or that. I can’t wait till I had this job, or this task is finished, etc, etc.
I am going to commit to stay in the moment, and to stop wishing for a future. The time is now, and it is leaving us so fast. Don’t neglect time, it is also a blessing in its own right.
So I realized this, sitting with my friend cleaning an apartment room talking about the past. We continued to talk and walk through are divergence of our life paths. There was a sense of joy, but at the same time a sense of sadness. We both knew that our lives where reaching a point where we might not enjoy time like this again, but we had to enjoy it while it lasted. He had to continue his life path, and I had to continue mine. We would always be friends, but time to hang out will be rare if not unlikely in the future. We had reached the crossroads. He will go left and I will go right. So we said our goodbyes and talked about getting together some time. Though, we both knew that it wasn’t likely, we still played along. It was just another life change that happens before you know it. Hmmm… life interesting.